Saturday, December 26, 2009

beating myself up

i really hate owing people money.

but what i hate more is owing money to the credit card companies...like Dave says they are snakes. Well, we have one card in particular we hate because the interest rates are 30% when you aren't in your promotional period, which is absolutely outrageous...but it's the card for fixing all my dental problems. i had work done in Jan 09 that i put on this card and it has a promotional period of no interest for 12 months, so obviously, in Jan 2010 it will expire, and when it does it will add the interest that was "deferred" over the whole year which for us would be $415 which is just ridiculous, but anyhow, supposedly if you are late on a payment you will forfeit the promotion and deferred finance charges will be added. well, for some reason, we were late in April paying them...i was not on top of things and we were late...but we didn't have the finance charges added to the bill... which i thought was odd... so we kept paying, and in Sept we were late by 2 days or something? which they also never added these deferred finance charges...well, we had a balance of $800 and since the deal would be expiring soon, i was going to pay off the balance as soon as we got paid this week... today i get on to see what needed to be paid with this check and see this bill was on it, so i go to the website, (which btw the billing cycle starts over on the 17th of every month, so it just rolled over a new cycle recently) and i see that they have added these deferred interest charges of $415 flippin dollars... at the bottom it says the promotion was terminated because minimum payment was not paid when due... i haven't been late the last 2 months, but i know i have been late...so, why did they wait till now??? ugh, i swear i'm fighting this one... i know i paid it late, but shouldn't they have acknowledged it by tacking on the interest then?? i am just so frustrated with this...we don't have freakin $400 dollars to dish out!!! with all these other bills that we have and all the sacrifices we are/were making it just feels like we have fallen down and now that we are down all the creditors and bills are just beating the crap out of us till there is nothing left.

i guess the part that i hate the most is, i should have been with it and paid it on time... and this could have been prevented... i have paid my share of stupid tax, but recently it feels like i should know better, and i slip up and man that was one costly mistake... and i can't get over it. we don't get to enjoy our income right now it seems. yes we have a house, but we aren't living a lavish lifestyle in the least... most of the things we have have been gifts... i can't tell you the last time i bought clothes for myself. cuz it was probably around my birthday and i spent all of 6 dollars at the thrift store on a new shirt and pants...well new to me anyway. we are barely living paycheck to paycheck and something like this comes up, and that valuable money is gone. and i constantly pray for a way out. when we get our income tax return (thanks to the $8000 tax credit we will get for buying the house) it will basically all go towards getting out of debt. and we will have almost nothing left after that. and even with that $375 a month that will be freed up from being out of debt save the mortgage, we will hardly feel it...car insurance is going up, with spring coming, that means the electric bill will be going up, we will actually be able to have a real grocery budget (we try to work with $160 a month for groceries (which is not just food but anything we need from the store)) and soon that savings is spent and it will be hard to find room for "savings" to get that second vehicle or to "splurge" and go to a movie theater or a restuarant. when will it turn around and we can start getting traction is the question... and that to a point is out of my control. with john's crazy work hours it's impossible for me to find a side job especially since we only have one car... so it's all up to john. he's doing great with impressing the DM, but will it be enough? i try to be understanding, and when he stays late to finish something, i know why. i've let him have his video games to relax him, and try not to pester him about what he's not doing. he's under a lot of pressure. he knows he needs to stand out, and that means putting in 200%, working those extra hours cleaning up someone else's' mess, and that is incredibly annoying and stressful. so i'm not going to hassle him.

i am just down. i want so badly to be free of this mess so i can feel happy, cuz it's hard to feel happy with so much stress about money... i just want to scream sometimes when i hear people talking about money and their version of "cutting back". and i know i am certainly not in the worst condition, there are people on the Dave Ramsey talk show that make you want to cry for them their problems are so much worse... but these people fussing because they feel like it's so hard to cut out the "luxuries" (shopping, restaurants, movie theaters, etc) you know what, maybe a little sacrifice is good for you...

anyway, blah blah blah, life just sucks to me right now. hopefully going to church tomorrow will cheer me up? if the kids decide to behave. sigh.... i am done being stressed. i just want a day to relax and release all this tension.

3 comments:

Jenn said...

Not to be the annoying sister, but Naomi, be grateful. Be grateful that your DH has a job. Mine didn't for over half of the year. Be grateful you have food in your house to eat and don't have to beg for it. Be grateful you aren't "waiting" to have children while everyone else enjoys the "benefits" of gov't aid. Be grateful LSU isn't screwing with your life causing your DH's college career to prolong itself and causing you to be broke in the process. Not that my life is worse than yours by any means, but if there is one thing that I have learned this year it is to be grateful. Instead of asking asking asking in your prayers, thank thank thank. Do all that you can do and then the Lord will pick up where you cannot. Everyone has to make sacrifices. It's part of life. You are just LUCKY enough to learn the lesson now while you are "young and poor" (just a figure of speech) instead of 40 or 50 when your kids want to go to school or something or get married and you can barely support yourself much less them. Consider yourself blessed. The Lord knows what you are doing and what John is doing. Trust me He has helped you all along the way. Love you!

Jamie Hamilton said...

I feel your pain. Earlier this year, I made a mistake with a credit card, too and it made me so sick! I thought I paid it off but didn't realize a little $20 something charge went through after I paid it off. I thought it was done and I wasn't getting statements in the mail b/c I did everything online but I had canceled the online payments. So like six months later, add on late fees + outrageous interest, it had piled up and that stinking $20 turned into a huge amount. A debt collection company called me (I really appreciated how the credit card company didn't bother to call or send anything by mail to let me know they were turning it over to collection!) and I paid it off right away but I was so upset I wanted to cry! And the worst part was that it was all my fault and there was no way to go back in time and change it! I HATE CREDIT CARDS!!!!

Omi said...

you are absolutely right Jenn, i do need to be grateful. and i am. some times it's hard to remember that tho. i am very grateful that DH has a job and a good one to boot. we aren't waiting to have children yes, but can you imagine trying to raise a child while Markus finishes school? it would be quite stressful, you'd have to work and you wouldn't get to enjoy the kiddo like you would if you stayed at home...i can't imagine how hard it must be to wait for something like having kids, but it's a huge responsiblity, so the more time you have to prepare, the better...

and by the way, thank you again for introducing me to Dave Ramsey and his total money makeover. i guess i have you to thank for being lucky enough to learn the lesson while i'm young.

Jaime - that sounds awful! i can totally relate to the stupid creditors not trying to contact you at all before sending it to collections... we had a medical bill from when kathryn was in the ER that we never recieved...it went through the insurance and all, but we never got a bill so we didn't know who to send the check to, so we figured we'd get it eventually...now 2 1/2 years later, an attorney sent us a letter stating we had to pay it or they would have a judgement against us! it was just $42! i couldn't believe it!