when kathryn gets hurt to the point of crying she usually cries for a while, and nothing quiets her faster than a piece of candy. when kathryn has taken all of her toys and dumped them on the floor just for the heck of it and doesn't want to pick them up...candy gets them cleaned up really fast! so when we started potty training, i tried on my own, and she actually regressed, until a friend gave me some advice: candy and amazing praise, and it definitely worked! now that she is potty trained, she goes to the bathroom so many times that as soon as i put her pants back on (she takes them completely off) she has them off again, and refuses to try to put them on herself. so i have come up with a plan...candy. i have seen her successfully put her panties and pants on, so i know she can do it...so if she does, she gets candy!
is that mentality wrong? i am trying to teach her that if she does the right thing she will be rewarded...i guess that may not be the lesson she is getting from it. i know eventually candy will turn into money, but i guess it's better for her to know she has to do something to be rewarded, she can't just get something for nothing right? i know this is far too deep for a toddler to understand, but what is your opinion on "bribes"?
2 comments:
how did you potty train her? we're working with brooklyn with no success. i refuse to buy pull ups because we have started with panties. i've even tried bribing with candy.
Candy and treats can work...stickers and prizes can work. Do whatever it takes to get them started and then slowly change it as the ideas come to something thats not a cost so to speak. They say time is the best reward. Time reading a book of their choice, or a game of their choice or making cookies or helping Mommy do something really really cool. Extra time playing if you keep to strict schedules so they know they are being rewarded. It's not easy...but eventually they get it and you use the time trick for something else they need to work on. On the reverse...when they are in trouble don't give them your attention. Do whatever scolding..."that's not a nice thing,that's not ok, etc...and then give them silence. A corner or the room works, but it doesn't have to be that. Most just want your attention...especially if there's other children in the house. Believe me I am not the expert, but this is what i've read and been told by experts...pediatricians, NP's, psychologist...it's a process...and it takes time to learn. Consistency they say is the key, no matter how tired you are be consistent with the rules.
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